We have to admit that our teenage years are a difficult stage in our lives. During that time, we are often tested and later realize that test had a great impact on us today. Sometimes we look at an individual and the first thing that comes to our mind if they are smiling and enjoying themselves is, "I wish I could live that person’s life, they seem so happy, free from problems and hardships."
The truth is that nobody has a life free from hardships. It is easy to hide what we have been through and to keep the pain that continually adds up inside without opening up and discussing the problem. One of the most important things I have learned is constantly keeping things to yourself can lead to a more severe anxiety and depression.
Depression has become a very serious and common illness among teenagers in today's society. We face certain temptations and are pressured to get no less than an A+ in school. From personal experience, I have to admit that depression is very hard to overcome and recover from. You cannot simply wake up one morning, go to a therapist for a 45 minute session, and feel happy and cheerful again. Recovering from depression, anxiety and panic attacks takes a while, for some people it may take weeks, and for others it may take months or even years depending on how hard they are willing to work with the therapist, psychiatrist, and anti depressants.
The hardest part to getting through depression is not knowing who to turn to for help. It becomes very hard for us to trust people and take advice because we have isolated ourselves completely from the people we love. It becomes extremely hard to control our emotions as well. The first step is to discuss your problem with the parent you feel most comfortable with. Letting out your emotions is one way of reducing depression because emotions will eventually control you if you let them build up.
While I was attending my regular session with my therapist in Ann Arbor, Michigan one day, she said to me, "one of my other patients describes depression as a beast that has taken over you."
After my recovery, I realized that was exactly what I felt. The reason I had realized that afterwards was because while experiencing depression, it becomes almost impossible to explain your feelings. You feel hopeless and when the therapist asks questions, you have this constant thought of, "what is the point in discussing this, I'll never feel happy and normal again." That is not true.
Although I have had a history with antidepressants and therapy, and later on ending up in the hospital for an eating disorder, I am completely against them. I have learned from this experience that religion is the ultimate cure for depression. Allah will never leave his servant helpless with a sincere intention of wanting to change and live a faithful and prosperous life. Staying in the hospital for a few days gave me time to reflect on life, its meaning, and my goals. It was at that time when Allah guided me and showed me the right path, without the antidepressants and therapy.
I remember one day I was eating lunch in the dining hall, and I looked around the dining room and saw a young boy, at the age of 9 or 10, sitting alone. My family was in the dining room with me, and I saw that as the young boy's father walked into the room, he ran for his father to hug him as if he hadn't seen him in months. After lunch my family went home, and I later found out that this young boy had a disease, which I do not want to mention the name of, and all he wanted was to spend time with his parents but they are busy with their business. They visit him once a week for a few minutes.
At that moment I asked myself, "why is it that I am so ungrateful to have loving parents who came to spend time with me every single day I was in that hospital?" That is when I remembered the verse in the Holy Qur’an, which tells us that "very few of My servants are grateful."
From this experience, I would just like to say that there is truly nothing worth being depressed over in this world. We need to put our faith in Allah and trust that he will protect us from anything and everything. Let us make the hereafter our main priority and if we focus on that alone, and I can guarantee that depression will not be a problem.
*The purpose of this article is to provide an Islamic perspective on a medical issue and is only intended to be informational. It should not be considered a substitute for professional medical or psychiatric assistance.
Subscribe to this comment's feedThank you sister Duaa, this is a topic that is not very well discussed but it is a very widespread problem, almost everyone experiences depression at some point in their lives, especially in teen years (myself included). Your honesty in expressing yourself is exactly what we need. I think we should expand on this and even perhaps set up a group (I do not know of one that exists) that works on helping educate our Brothers and Sisters that are afflicted with this or other mental disorders. Unfortunately, many if our communitiies (especially the older generations) brush off depression as merely a shortcoming of the victim, often not recognizing the gravity of the situation. In fact, a brother in our community in MI commit suicide fairly recently due to his lack of strength in dealng with the beast - a strength which we must provide each other. I'd love to see more of this and would love to help if I can insha'Allah.
Jazakallah Khair
Wasalaam
--Amir Naqvi
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I agree a group would be a great idea-it is much needed during this time because of everything that is taking place around the world that has an effect on us, often times leading to depression. I know many people who always say, "If I told you what I have been through, you would not understand my feelings during my depression." So I thought why not discuss my experience, although it's a bit personal, it is beneficial to many (Insh'Allah). Alhamdulilah I had the opportunity to share my solution to the "Beast" and I pray that Allah (swt) allows others to use the same solution, religion.
Beautiful article and I agree with you on the importance of spirituality and the value of a strong supportive family. Not all mental disorders is solely cured by medications. It is a grave injustice to think in this manner. However, it is equally tragic to think that medications have no role in the treatment of mental illness. Also, we often confuse depression with adjustment disorder or even dysthymia in which maybe talk therapy or cognitive behavorial therapy is a better modality. The diagnosis of depression is real and without treatment is deadly. I have seen first hand how antidepressants can and have saved lives. Yes, many people are on antidepressants and the majority of antidepressants are prescribed by non-Psychiatrists (i.e primary care physicians) but for some people this is the best form of treatment and we as a community should be wary of giving each other information that may not be in their best interest. In addition to strong iman, a loving family, a strong, caring community is also essential to mental well being.
Fee Amaniallah
The point I was trying to make is that we need to turn to Allah (swt) before the antidepressants. Yes the antidepressants have saved lives but they can make a believer back away from religion because some of them make us careless towards Islamic duties while on them. And antidepressants are temporary relief, from my experience. They make you feel better for a while, then you either become addicted to them or end up depressed after a while. And what we need is Muslim therapists, they are very necessary...But if someone feels that they cannot turn to Allah (swt) for whatever reason first, then they have no choice but to use antidepressants to get them back on track and risk getting addicted to them otherwise they'll end up considering suicide as the answer...Insh'Allah khair...
It's the way you think, to be specific.. the negativity is what stops you from getting through depression. Here's an example, if someone is going out in this world to prove the existence of God, if they go out with an open heart, don't you think they will eventually find God? Whereas, if they went out searching and telling themselves, "this is a waste of time..." they will DEFINITELY not find what they are looking for. The way you think is very similar to this...if you keep telling yourself, "why waste time by praying and asking dua" then you will find no purpose in your prayers and Duas. You need to seek God's mercy with a sincere heart and most importantly, HOPE that he will answer your Duas and give you a better life. Have a positive outlook on life. Life is not easy, but with difficulty comes ease. Because whenever something happens, in the end it is only Allah (swt) we return to. In your situation, spend time just speaking with Allah (swt), through prayers or just his remembrance...Allah (swt) is the All-Hearing, and I have to admit sometimes things happen that are out of our control and they cause us to be very disappointed and sometimes depressed by just the thought that Allah (swt) knows best and the trials he gives us are for our own good keeps me on the right track. Look at life in this way, Allah (swt) has given us more than our "needs" so let's be thankful for that. Difficulties will come and go but what matters is how we deal with them...do they bring us closer to Allah (swt) or do we get farther and farther away from our religion? Constantly remind yourself of the tragedies Ahlulbayt (as) had to face, Sayida Zaineb (as) faced something that nobody has ever been through...she had to be patient through the tragedy of Karbala, a tragedy like no other in history, and yet she did not complain, she understood that bearing the pain of this dunya, no matter how hard it may be, will result in great reward in the hereafter, make that your focus...worry about the hereafter and you will get out of this depression...Allah Kareem...
Yassir,
Focus on all the good things Allah has given you-which you take for granted and then you will be fine.
Also, sometimes the duas are answered years later, like in the case of Prophet Musa (AS) who had a dua answered 40 years later.
I think we can beat depression by going back to basics in Islam. Like the 6 concepts of Iman. We need to accept QadrulAllah (Allah's will) good or bad. Whatever tragedy caused our depression may be a test from Allah. So can accept Allah's will and hopefully you will be fine.
This world is full of tests. May be Allah is testing your patience. Be patient, keep praying and inshaAllah you will be fine.
I really applaud you for your honesty and your heartfelt explication of the realities of depression. I am currently dealing with it and you're right on the ball with everything.
Allah (swt) tests us in many ways, and with the things we value the most i.e. health being one of them. I agree with the brother who said that patience and prayer is crucial. Faith in God, handing over our unmanageable lives to God is necessary for we have to accept who we are and what our situation is as well as stay positive.
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